Intuition
by acciosilverdoe
Summary: -HIATUS- It feels like the perfect escape from the pain, but even the most well organized plan can go horribly wrong. Addison/Alex, with some other pairings.
1. Dizzy

Okay, I'm a few chapters into this now so I thought I'd update the first chapter! Umm, can't really give a summary until after the first chapter so just read…(& review!!)

You may have guessed I'm a huge huge huge Addison/Alex fan, I hate the spin-off & I hate Alex now but they will live on in fic, that's for sure!!

And I will still update Second Chances!!

Disclaimer: I don't own anything, Shondaland, Grey's Anatomy or anything to do with it.

Here goes hope you like…

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Addison never wanted to seriously hurt herself, she just wanted somebody to notice her. Ever since Meredith had almost drowned, everyone paid her constant attention, like she was going to jump into another icy pool of water. 'Why would she', Addison asked herself over & over again. Sure, Meredith's mother had died but they'd never been that close, & besides, she had Derek & anyone could see he was crazy about her.

Somehow, Addison had found herself alone in a supply closet, with a bottle of pills & water. She had a headache, so she took two. Staring at the floor, she sighed. Things were getting harder by the day, & she couldn't see them getting any better. Grabbing the pills, she swallowed another two, washing them down with water. She poured the rest into her hand, counting them with her fingers, wondering how much the pain would disappear if she swallowed them. There were ten, with the ones she's already taken that would be fourteen. All she had to do was summon the courage to swallow. She took a deep breath, millions of emotions running through her. She couldn't be sure if anyone would find her, even if they did would they care? She let out a long, painful breath, threw her head back & dropped the pills into her mouth. Grabbing the water, she swallowed hard.

It only took a few minutes for the effects of the pills to begin. Firsts she felt dizzy & hot, but taking off her jacket made her cold. Her breathing got faster, he breaths painful & raspy. She stood up, but immediately regretted it, feeling faint & light-headed. But she had to move. She took a step forward & came crashing down on a shelf full of medical equipment. Sure someone outside would hear, she kicked the empty pill bottle out of sight. She waited but nobody came.

Who was she trying to kid? Nobody would notice if she went missing. Alex Karev might have said he would, but where was he now? When she really needed him to notice she was missing, where was he? Addison felt a pang of jealousy when she thought about Alex, that he had time to forget about her, the friends to take his mind off of her. What made he think he even had his mind on her at all? He'd told her he wasn't interested, so why did she still feel something for him? She was guilty that she blamed him, it wasn't his fault she felt so alone, he'd just made her think he'd be there for her, but he wasn't. He was young, he deserved to be out having fun. Hell, they were surgeons they had to make the most of the little free time they had. She shook her head & buried it in her hands.

A wave of nausea suddenly came over her & she grabbed the shelf supports to stop herself collapsing. What had she done? She felt sick, she was sweating like mad but shivering too. She was terrified of what was happening to her. Attempting to stand, she felt weak & knew she would be on the floor in a crumpled heap in a matter of seconds. Reaching for the door handle, another wave of nausea came over her but she ignored it, knowing she had to get the door open. Finally, she felt the cool wood on her palm & twisted the handle frantically whilst using all her strength not to fall down. She heard a click & the door opened slightly, the bright light causing her head to spin. She let out a groan & attempted to call for help. Only a small, almost inaudible sound came out as she collapsed to the fall.

"Help me, Alex."

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Yeah, pretty bad right? Sorry it wasn't very long but I only wanted that to happen in the first chapter. Please review & I'll update as soon as I can! Next chapter: will Addie be found in time? 


	2. The Trick Is To Keep Breathing

Author's Note: Seriously thanks so much for the reviews!! They were quick too! You guys rock!  
I was going to update earlier but I was too busy to type anything up & then my computer went stupid so here it is, sorry it's so late!!

This chapter: Will Addison be found in time? (hint. If she wasn't, would there be an Addex note in the summary? LOL) And who by? Read on.. LOL here's chapter 2 of Intuition!! Oh, by the way, Alex lives in an apartment in this story rather that with Meredith & Izzie.

Disclaimer: See Chap.1

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Izzie walked down the silent hallway, the only sound coming from her heavy footsteps against the cold hospital floor. It had been a long day; few patients all with minor problems. The board had been wiped clean & the surgeons had left for a peaceful evening. She should have seen the signs; a quiet board means trouble.

Turning the corner, another empty hallway awaited her. She paused for a moment, wondering whether she really wanted to go home. She knew George & Callie would be there, & ever since her & George's drunken night together things had been awkward. Well, more awkward than usual. It was common knowledge that Izzie didn't like Callie, but she knew she couldn't get away with what she'd done using that.

She shook her head, not showing would be more suspicious. She carried on down the hallway, pausing again at the nurse's station where Olivia sat. She looked up at the blonde doctor, surprised she hadn't yet left.

"So, there's no more patients?" Izzie asked, hoping she didn't sound too desperate.

Olivia shook her head, slightly confused. " No, I'm going now anyway, bye."

She didn't wait for Izzie's reply, leaving her standing alone. Sighing, she turned to follow her towards the exit. She stopped suddenly as she heard a noise coming from a nearby supply closet. A little scared but also curious, she stood rooted to the spot. The handle began to turn & she caught her breath in her throat. After a few seconds the door opened slightly & Izzie stepped forwards. She pushed the door uncertainly & stopped in her tracks.

She let out a breath she didn't know she was holding & raised her hand to her mouth.

"Oh god," she breathed as she stared at the crumpled heap that was Addison Montgomery.

It took a few seconds for her to realise she had to help. She bent down next to the attending.

"Dr. Montgomery?" Nothing. "Addison?"

A small groan came out of Addison's mouth & her eyes flicked open. She pointed weakly towards the empty pill bottle before closing her eyes again.

Izzie grabbed the bottle, realising then what Addison had done. Grabbing her pager she paged the first person who came to her mind: Alex.

Alex sighed, rubbing his face. He sat between Meredith & Derek who were deep in a slightly porny conversation, & Cristina & Burke who were attempting unsuccessfully to have a quiet argument. Opposite him was Callie & George who were smiling as they chatted calmly. Alex felt like a spare part among the three couples.

It wasn't as it he didn't have anyone he could be with. If he was desperate he could sleep with Izzie. It might take a bit of persuading after the Denny Duquette episode but Alex could be very convincing. Or he could sleep with a nurse, well Olivia, or any other random girl. But the truth was he didn't want Izzie, or Olivia, or any other 'random' girl. He wanted Addison, but he knew it was almost impossible. She was his attending,. He was good friends with her ex-husband's girlfriend. But he wanted he badly, more than he'd wanted anybody before. He couldn't get her out of his head, every time he saw her he wanted to grab & kiss her. He couldn't think straight around her. She was perfect to him, even though she was an emotional mess. He knew better than to mess with her head any more. But he couldn't get their kiss out of his head, he could still feel her fingers on his face, her lips on his. He could still taste her. God, he wanted her.

The room went silent as a pager began to beep. Everyone stopped what they were doing to check theirs as Alex raised his hand.

"It's mine," he said staring at the pager with a confused expression.

"Who is it?" Meredith asked as Derek watched him closely, while the two other couples continued their previous activities.

Alex continued to stare. "It's Izzie. But I don't understand it. It says 911 Dr. F.M, who's Dr. F.M?" he thought aloud.

Both Meredith & Derek thought carefully.

"Oh god," Derek said, suddenly realising. "It's Addison." He immediately jumped to his feet.

"What?" Alex stared at Derek.

"Dr. F.M, Dr. Forbes-Montgomery." Derek answered.

Alex gulped & jumped to his feet frantically. "We have to get to the hospital," he said, his words a jumbled mess.

Derek nodded, slightly taken aback by the intern's concern for his ex-wife. He turned back to Meredith who simply gestured towards the open door where Alex had just ran.

Alex was already in the car when Derek left the house. The engine was running & he was sitting impatiently.

"Hurry up!" Alex yelled.

"Why do you care so much?" Derek asked closing the car door behind him.

Alex pushed his foot down on the pedal, the car jumping into life & pulling forwards. The noise of the engine drowning out his voice he said: "because I love her."

The journey to the hospital was short but it felt like a lifetime to Alex. He watched Derek who was nervously playing with his phone, entering & then deleting someone's number.

"Who you calling?" Alex asked.

"No one, I was just-" Derek stopped & raised his head to look at Alex. "I was thinking whether I should phone Mark."

"Don't," Alex said before realising how it must have sounded. He turned his head to concentrate on the road ahead.

"What?" Derek asked curiously.

"Nothing, it doesn't matter. I just…I don't think Addi-I mean Dr. Montgomery- would really want him there. They're not exactly friends or anything are they?"

"No, I suppose you're right."

The rest of the journey was spent in silence, neither man knowing what to say to the other. As they pulled up at the hospital, Derek spoke again: 

"Is there something going on between you & Addison?"

Alex stopped the car & turned to look at him. "I-umm-no. No, of course not."

Derek nodded unconvinced. He opened the door & begain to walk quickly towards the hospital. Alex didn't move straight away, deciding to let Derek get ahead. After a few seconds though, he couldn't sit there any more & got out of the car, sprinting towards the hospital.

Izzie stood waiting impatiently for Alex to show up. As the minutes ticked by, she was more & more convinced that he wasn't coming. Maybe he hadn't understood & taken it as a mistake, or maybe even as a desperate attempt to avoid Callie. Izzie eye's never left the door, praying it would open soon.

Sure enough the door did open but it wasn't Alex who walked through it, it was Derek. 'Great', she thought, 'just what Dr. Montgomery needs'.

"Dr. Stevens," Derek caught her attention.

She nodded, unwilling it speak to him.

"Is Addison okay? Dr. Karev got the pager, he's just coming we drove here together," Derek searched her face for clues, worried.

"Oh, right. Yeah, she's okay," Izzie watched the door still waiting for Alex.

She wasn't sure why she needed Alex so much. It wasn't as it they were a couple any more. Hell, they weren't even that good friends. But somehow she knew Alex would listen, would act as if he cared even if he didn't.

The door opening made both Izzie & Derek jump, & Izzie immediately relaxed when she saw Alex. Walking towards he, he looked strong & protective &…upset.

The pain was evident in his eyes, like a hurt young child. Izzie wasn't sure if he was going to stop in front of her or just carry on until he found what he was looking for. He did stop, however.

"What happened?" he asked, the desperation obvious in his voice.

"I found he in a supply closet passed out. I paged you as soon as I found her. I had no idea what had happened but she wasn't completely unconscious & she showed me this," she held up the empty pill bottle. "She overdosed Alex, & I have no idea why."

Alex didn't wait to hear any more, he just rushed to the room where nurses were going in & out. He stopped at the doorway & stared in. Addison lay in the bed, loose curls of her red hair spread over the pillow. Wires ran in & out of her body & all that could be heard was the machines beeping. She looked so tiny, so vulnerable, & Alex didn't care what people thought of him right then as tears began to fall down his face. This wasn't right, not any of it. He hated to think that if he'd just told her the truth in that supply closet instead of saying that he wasn't interested, she would have been okay. Maybe he could have made all the pain she felt go away. He hated himself for not realising she was hurting. He hated everyone at the hospital for not realising. He hated it all.

He stepped in & slowly made his may to her side, his eyes never leaving her face. He took a seat in the chair beside her bed & took her hand in him. He was vaguely of the nurses coming in & checking her, but he never let her hand go. He would sit here until she was awake, not matter how long it took.

After a couple of hours he was beginning to feel tired. He could feel his eyelids drooping but he did all he could to fight sleep. He glanced out the door quickly, seeing Izzie standing against the doorframe.

"Alex, don't you think you should get some sleep?" she asked concerned.

"I'm not leaving until she's awake, even it that's not for days. And even then I'll be hesitant to go," Alex replied, & Izzie knew his mind was set.

"You need to sleep Alex, I know you want to stay with her but-" Alex cut her off.

"But what? I don't get you, Izzie. After the whole thing with Denny, you tell me I have to move on. That it was the only way I could ever be happy. And then when I finally do, you try to stop me. You want the truth? I love her, Izzie. And I don't mean in a way that I just want to sleep with her, or to get ahead because I'm her intern. I really love her. I want to he with her, no matter what. I would go through hell if it meant she'd be okay. And right now, there is nothing I wouldn't do to get her to wake up," Alex took his eyes from the floor & looked at Izzie.

She bit her lip, taking in Alex's speech. It had been powerful for sure, & she could see he really meant it. She watched him sitting, his face red from crying. It must have taken some love to make Alex Karev cry.

Izzie nodded, "goodnight Alex," she said & walked out. She didn't want to question him in case he started crying again.

Now alone again, Alex gazed at Addison's face. She was beautiful as usual, she looked so peaceful sleeping. She carefully brushed her hair out of her eyes & leant over to kiss her forehead.

His lips lingered on her for a moment & he whispered gently, "Come on, Addie. Please wake up. I need you. I-" he took a deep breath. "I love you."

He pulled back slightly still watching her for any kind of sign. As he watched her, her eyelids began to twitch. He pulled further back, keeping his eyes on her the whole time. Finally, her eyelids flicked open.

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A/N: Okay, thanks for reading, hope you liked it! Please review & let me know what you thought, good or bad!! Next chapter: some Addex yay, a conversation between the interns & Addie goes home, kind of. The more reviews the quicker the update hint hint!! Thank you again! Beth xx 


	3. How To Save A Life

Okay, thanks for all the reviews, you guys rock seriously! I know it has been ages since I updated last but I've been busy & this is like the first day I've had to do what I want. So here's the next chapter anyway, enjoy & please review! By the way, this happened somewhere between the kiss at Joe's & Desire, in case you were wondering.

Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy

P.S: If you haven't already, please R&R The Perfect Goodbye, it's my new story & I really enjoyed writing it & would like some feedback! Thanks

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Alex didn't move for a few seconds, watching Addison as she slowly woke up. He'd waited for this, but now he wasn't sure how to react.

Addison took a while to take in the room. She felt groggy & her memory was fuzzy. She couldn't remember what she'd done but she knew it must have been had for her to end up here. She looked at Alex, his face full of concern.

"Alex?" she forced out, her voice low & crackly & her throat tight.

"It's okay, I'm here," he squeezed her hand reassuringly.

"Hello!" They both turned to the sound of the voice.

"Hi," Addison replied to the nurse.

"I just need to check how you are so…"

Alex didn't hear the rest of the conversation. He had so many things he wanted to say to Addison & he just needed to decide how. He watched as the nurse worked, but he didn't feel like he was really there. He saw the nurse smile as him & leave, & he turned his attention back to Addison.

She smiled at him gently, still wondering why both of them were here. She sighed & turned the other way & stared into space.

"How do you feel?" she turned back to Alex.

"Confused. My memory's a bit foggy," she shut her eyes seeing if it helped at all.

They sat in silence for a while longer. Slowly Addison began to remember small pieces of the moments before her 'accident', whatever that was. She remembered Derek & Mark. She remembered people from the hospital & a few patients she had recently treated. She remembered kissing Alex & him telling her he wasn't interested. But she couldn't recall what she'd done.

"Alex," she said, taking a deep breath. "Tell me what I did."

GAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGA

Two days later, Addison was released from hospital. She had been kept in for observation but was now seen as 'safe'. The chief had visited her often, along with many other surgeons. Alex had hardly left the room, worried he would miss something vital if he left for too long. She was still having trouble remembering what had happened. Alex had been told she had to remember herself, but seeing her struggle with the truth was killing him.

Just as she was packing up her things, Richard came in to talk.

"Addie, look, I know you can't remember much & we're leaving it to you, but be careful okay? I want you to stay with someone so you're not alone so," he reached & opened the door. "You can stay with Alex."

Alex walked in, a cheesy grin on his face. He would have Addison staying in his apartment, he could hardly contain his excitement.

Addison, however, was unconvinced. Although she'd loved having him around, she couldn't help but feel he would soon leave her like Mark & Derek had.

Richard smiled genuinely at her, kissed her forehead & left. She looked at Alex.

"H-hi," she stuttered.

"Hey. You're going home, well kind of. At least you get out of here," Alex said cheerfully. "You ready to go?"

When she nodded, Alex grabbed her case & opened the door. Addison hesitated slightly.

He turned to look at her, frowning when he saw she looked lost. He put her case down & walked over to her, putting his hands on her arms reassuringly.

"Look, I know you're still confused, but it's going to be okay. We'll have fun!" Alex said in an attempt to cheer her up, which failed. Sighing, he lead her over to the bed & sat down, pulling her down next to him. "Addie, I know you don't think you can trust me, but you can. Just give it a shot?"

Addison sighed. "I don't know. I don't even remember what happened to me. I just see myself alone & helpless with a lot of pills &-" she stopped suddenly realising.

"Addie?" Alex swallowed, watching her.

"Oh god," she whispered. Tears began to fall freely down her face as new parts of the night came back to her.

"Hey, shhh," Alex wrapped a protective arm around her & hugged her. He could feel his top getting wet with her tears but he would hold her all day if he had to.

The room was quiet except for Addison's sobs. She felt like an idiot. She couldn't even be sure she was right, it just made a lot of sense. She'd been lonely, & upset, but an overdose? It didn't sound like something she'd do, but-. But. That's all it came down to. Slowly she peeled herself away from Alex.

He gazed at her, taking in her bloodshot eyes & her tear streaked face. He wiped her face gently & held her more, not saying anything. They sat together for a moment in silence.

Slowly she regained herself & untangled her body from Alex's arms. She carefully stood up & turned back to face him.

"Addison I'm sorry," Alex said weakly.

"I should be the one saying that, Alex, I just don't see a way out of this loneliness. I had Derek but I lost him, then I lost Mark, & now I'm losing Callie. I don't know who I can turn to any more," she sighed & looked at the floor, then at the walls, anywhere but into his eyes. "I mean, I know it's stupid but I sort of wish I hadn't been found. I need to get away, or I need someone to act like they care 'cause right now nobody is."

Alex bit his lip uncertainly. Her eyes were so full of pain & he wanted to help her so much.

"I care."

Addison shook her head. "Words mean nothing, Alex. You could say a million nice things to me but until you prove them, they're meaningless. I really, really want you to be right. But I can't believe what's not certain right now."

He stared at the floor, searching for a way he could prove it to her. He would do it, that he was certain of.

"We need to go," Addison said, standing up straighter & brushing herself down.

"Yeah," he agreed, standing up & grabbing her case again.

"Alex, I'm-"

"No, don't", he avoided looking at her. "It's probably better. We're going to be living together after all so we shouldn't make things more awkward than they're going to be," he opened the door.

"Thank you. I will make this up to you," Addison smiled.

Alex simply nodded, he doubted she was going to make it up to him the way he wanted.

GAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGA

Alex drove her home but decided to leave her to settle in. He went back to the hospital, even though he wasn't meant to be working, & met the other interns in the cafeteria.

"Hey guys," he said & sat down.

"Hey, how's Dr. Montgomery?" George asked.

"Okay, I left her to settle in."

"And how are you?" Meredith watched him closely.

"I'm okay, I mean these last few days have been a nightmare. She doesn't believe that I care, & earlier she said she wished she hadn't been found. How am I meant to react to that?" he put his head in his hands.

Nobody said anything, but were all startled when a pager beeped.

"That's me, gotta go," Cristina jumped up just as another pager beeped.

"Me too, see you later," George followed her.

Izzie & Meredith turned back to Alex.

"Have you told Addison yet?" Izzie asked.

"Told her what?" Meredith looked at Izzie.

"No, & I'm not planning to," Alex shrugged.

"What?" Meredith whined.

"Alex, if you don't tell her, you'll miss your chance. You never know what she might say."

"About what?"

"Izz, you didn't hear her when I told her I cared. She gave me a long speech on how she won't believe me until I prove it to her."

"Prove what?" Meredith was getting impatient.

"Well prove it to her. Cook her dinner every night, let her have the remote & watch the cheesy movies with her, take her out just for fun, listen when she talks & don't pretend to be listening while you watch TV or something. Show her that you are a good guy, then she'll know you care," Izzie watched as he realised she was right.

Meredith grabbed Alex's arm. "If you don't tell me I'll-" she paused & looked around the table, grabbing a spork. "I'll spork you!"

Alex laughed, "I'm scared, Mer!"

"I would be, she's not bright & shiny when she's angry," Izzie warned.

Meredith shot an evil glance at Izzie & stared back at Alex.

"Fine," Alex gave in. "I love Addison."

"Seriously? You?" Alex groaned as he turned to look at the person the voice came from.

Mark.

GAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGA

Addison had a good look around Alex's apartment before she started unpacking. She wasn't being nosy, she didn't force anything open & she didn't go near his room (not that she was sure she wanted to anyway).

Overall, Alex was actually quite tidy. There was the odd thing lying around but mostly everything looked good. He had a few photos up, Addison guessed of his family & friends back in Iowa, & a couple of the other

interns. His fridge wasn't packed but the food inside was good. He had a small selection of alcohol, enough for Addison to enjoy but not too much so he seemed like the guy to laze on the couch with a beer all day. He even had some wine, which made Addison very happy.

The room she was given was nice. It wasn't huge but she had plenty of room for everything. The closet was a good size for all her clothes & shoes. Finally after unpacking everything she settled flicking through TV channels & began watching a home-improvement show. She glanced over at his DVDs & began to look through them too. Mostly action movies but a few old classics, & even the odd chick flick.

As out of place as she felt, she really hoped living with a Alex Karev would help her the way she needed.

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A/N: Okay, thanks for reading please R&R! Oooh so Mark knows about Alex loving Addie humm.. And Alex was from Iowa right? Or was that Izzie? Ahh I only watched that episode two days ago how could I forget?! Anyway sorry if it's wrong but you get where I'm coming from!

P.S: If you read this ages ago, sorry about the little boxes & stuff. That was my computer messing about I don't really know what happened there :)


	4. Make This Go On Forever

**A/N: Sorry it took so long, I've been busy & stuff. Thanks to everyone who reviewed I love you!! Anyway here it is now, not gonna bore you so just read..**

**Disclaimer: Last time I checked, I didn't own Grey's ::cries::**

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Make This Go On Forever

Mark Sloan wasn't an idiot. He knew how to get what he wanted, whenever he wanted it, & right now he wanted the truth from Alex Karev. This had to be a joke, seriously!

"You love Addison?" Mark smirked. "And since when did you call her 'Addison'?"

"I don't have to answer to you," Alex shot back. "And since she was living with me."

Mark scoffed. "Seriously?" his eyebrows were raised in shock. "Now why would I believe that?"

"It's true," Meredith joined whilst Izzie nodded.

"Who asked you?" Mark snapped.

"Nobody, but as Alex's friend we have the right to-" she began before Mark cut her off.

"Just shut up, Grey."

"Don't tell me to shut up."

"I will if I want to, I'm your boss remember?" Mark smiled.

"Stop bothering the interns, Mark," Derek said as he joined the table next to Meredith. "Hey," he smiled, kissing her forehead.

"Awww, how nice," Mark said sarcastically. "Did you know your ex-wife is living with Karev?"

Derek nodded. "Yeah, it was the chief's idea. He doesn't want her to be alone, not after what happened. I think it's a good idea. It's not permenant Mark, just until she gets back to normal."

"Normal?" he shook his head. "How the hell is living with an intern going to help her get back to normal? Why didn't he ask me or you, or Torres, they're good friends, right?"

"Because I'm living with Mer & Izzie, Callie has George & I don't think you're exactly seen as 'responsible'," Derek answered calmly. "And besides, we were much of the problem. What with our marriage ending & you being, well, you. She can live with someone who won't mess her around, & who doesn't have an awkward history clipped to them."

"And that person's Karev?"

"He never left her side whilst she was here."

Mark paused, knowing he wasn't going to win this one. But he wasn't finished fighting yet. "Fine. But surely Karev sating he loves her is awkward enough," Mark shrugged, as if what he'd said was what they'd expected to hear next.

"What?" Derek said with a mouthful of food.

"You know what, I should go home now. Addison must have unpacked by now," Alex said standing up.

"But, wait, you-"

"Talk to them," Alex said gesturing to Meredith & Izzie. The last thing he needed right now was Derek on his back. "Bye," he said, & walked away.

Mark moved around & sat where Alex had been. "So?" he asked Derek curiously.

"So what? I'm going to talk to these two about Alex's apparent love for Addison, & then I'll make my own decision on the situation. I mean, no one can be worse for her than you, right?" Derek shrugged & took another bite of his sandwich.

Mark shook his head. "If anybody but me had told you, you'd never have given the idea a second thought, you'd have hated it straight away. You should get over that," he stood up, still in disbelief that after all this time Derek still found ways of showing he hated Mark. He stood up behind Izzie. "Bye Izzie," he whispered in her ear, grinning wildly as he walked away & left them.

Izzie rolled her eyes. "I don't even know why he still bothers with me!"

Derek laughed & turned to Meredith, turning serious again. "Okay, tell me everything about Alex Karev."

GAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGA

When Alex arrived home he found Addison laying on the couch with a bag of popcorn watching 'The Notebook'. She turned around, startled as he entered.

"Oh, hey, sorry. Hope you don't mind. I finished unpacking. Wanna watch it with me?" Addison smiled.

"I, ummm, 'The Notebook'? Not really my kind of movie," Alex replied.

"We can watch your kind of movie afterwards. C'mon, it'll be nice," she moved along the couch so there was room for him to sit down.

"Okay, but I choose it," he sighed, sitting down next to her.

"Deal," she pressed play to continue the film. They sat in silence for a moment before she said; "how come you have 'The Notebook' anyways?"

"Izzie probably left it here. I should give it back really," he put his feet up of the coffee table.

"You & Stevens dated?"

"Yeah, not for long though."

"Oh, okay," Addison looked at him. "How was the hospital?"

Alex cast his mind back to the conversation he'd had with Meredith & Izzie. "It was okay. Sloan got a bit pissed when he found out you were living here though."

"Mark gets jealous easily. He doesn't think it's possible for me to be just friends with a guy because he's never been just friends with a woman. What about Derek, did you see him?" Addison turned to look at Alex, who was watching her closely.

"Yeah, the chief told him, though. He seemed okay with it," he smiled.

"Yeah, Derek understands stuff, he was always good at understanding," she sighed thinking back to their marriage. She missed having someone like that.

Neither said anything from then on & just concentrated on the movie. Once it was finished Alex jumped up to choose the next one.

"Hummm, my kind of movie..." he trailed off whilst rooting through him DVDs. "How about 'Armageddon'?"

"Sure, never seen it," Addison nodded.

Alex jumped up quickly. "You've never seen it? Well it's sorted then! Seriously you haven't lived until you've seen it."

"Okay, can't wait then," she smiled. Alex loaded the DVD & took his seat back next to her. She turned to him, "it's not scary, is it?"

"Nope, just brilliant," Alex said.

Addison shifted slightly to tuck her legs underneath her, watching the movie closely. Neither spoke throughout the majority of the movie.

"Oh my god!" Addison exclaimed making Alex jump a little. "He's going to die isn't he," she moaned when Alex nodded. "You said it wasn't scary."

"It's not scary, just watch."

Addison kept her knees in front of her face & peered over them warily. "I can't watch," she moaned again as the film moved on the last few moments of Harry's (played by Bruce Willis) life. She moved closer to Alex & buried her head in his neck. He put a protective arm around her, still engrossed in the movie. Addison squeaked as there was a loud crash, & then silence. "Is it safe yet?" she mumbled, her voice masked by Alex's T-Shirt.

"Yeah, it's fine now."

She lifted her head to the screen, & then to Alex, who in turn looked at her & smiled. "You're cute," he smiled, kissing her forehead gently.

As he pulled back he locked eyes with her. He felt something inside of him ache & he wanted so much to kiss her again but he knew it wasn't what she needed.

Watching him closely, she felt comfomtable in his arms & didn't want to move. She remembered the way she'd felt about Derek when they first met & the way she'd once felt about Mark. Now she felt those things for Alex, as much as she tried to deny them. If only he was interested, but then he was the one who'd just kissed her & hadn't yet let go.

Before she knew what she was doing, she leant forward & met his lips. He kissed back without hesitating, shocked that she'd leant in first. He didn't even know what this meant but he wasn't going to stop & ask now. He tangled his spare hand in her hair & pulled her closer with his other hand which still linked around her waist. Breathless, Addison pulled away & leant her forehead on to his.

"You said you weren't interested," she whispered.

"I lied," he said, tracing her jawline with his finger softly.

"Yeah," she breathed & kissed him again.

Untangling his hand from her hair he lifted her chin up so she was looking directly at him & cupped her face in his hands. "Now do you believe that I care?" Alex asked, his voice & eyes full of hope & concern.

Addison bit her lip. "I wish it was that easy."

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**A/N: So there you go, another chapter. Here's where I'm stuck, though. I write this on paper first & I wrote this about a month ago, but I haven't written any for the next chapter & I have no idea where to take it, so ANY suggestions will help me. Anything at all. I only want to do another two or three chapters so there's not too much you have to give me. But please, inspiration anyone? Also, please review. Reviews make me happy, & make me write more, & my other stories are in need of a boost:) **

**Thanks for reading**

**Beth**


	5. A Change is Gonna Come

**A/N: Okay, hi, pretty quick update for me I must say, sorry it's not very long. Not going to rant too much, just want to say thanks for the reviews & thanks HuntingPeace who gave me ideas! They really helped. I tried to use them as best I could. So enjoy, & please review:)**

**Disclaimer: Think we've worked it out by now that I don't own Grey's!**

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After their kiss, Alex & Addison found things around each other awkward. He wanted her to realize how much he cared but thought he'd go too over the top & didn't try as hard as maybe he should have. She, on the other hand, wanted him to try harder. She needed him to fight.

Two weeks after Addison moved in, Alex told her it was his birthday coming up. She insisted on throwing his a party, if not for him for a chance for her to see the people from the hospital before she returned. They'd all agreed on three weeks off for her, & besides Callie, Miranda & Richard, nobody had visited. Alex agreed, knowing planning a party would keep her busy during the day when he was working. He did, however, make her promise not to do anything too special which she agreed to after a fight.

She decided to invite the four remaining interns, Callie & the three remaining attendings (it took her a while to decide whether or not to ask Mark but in the end she chose to because she knew he'd come anyway). During her visits, Miranda had insisted on missing the party, & Addison didn't think Richard would enjoy it too much either. She made Alex ask the four interns, who in turn would has the attendings & Callie, & Mark. He'd resisted at first about Mark, but she soon convinced him. He didn't take much convincing as right now he'd do pretty much anything for her.

The day before the party Alex left work early to help set some stuff up. He arrived home to find Addison attempting to hang 'Happy Birthday' banners whilst standing on a ladder which looked as if it could break any second.

"Addie, be careful," he said laughing slightly. He threw his keys down, closed the door & ran over to her.

"I'm fine, I just-" she squeaked as the step she was stood on snapped beneath her & she fell backwards. Alex moved quickly to catch her before she hit the ground & he laughed at the terrified look on her face. A few seconds later a banner fell down on her causing him to laugh even more.

"Yeah, you're fine," he said, putting her down on the floor gently but not letting go as she found her feet again. "Just think what would've happened if I wasn't here," he smiled.

She rolled her eyes. "Yeah, just think," she laughed & threw the banner around him.

"Hey!" he protested, trying to move it but she held it there. His hands moved from her shoulders down to around her waist, pulling her closer into him. He leant down & kissed her nose causing her to giggle & he moved his lips down to kiss her lips gently.

She smiled against his mouth, glad she could finally taste his lips again. After a few moments Addison pulled away, gasping for air. She smiled & linked her arms around his neck, playing tenderly with his hair. He kissed her forehead gently before she rested her head on his shoulder.

"Thank you," she whispered against his shoulder &, although she knew he couldn't see, smiled.

He kissed the top of her head. "No problem. I wasn't going to let you fall, was I?"

She shook her head & moved it off his shoulder so she could look at him. They locked eye contact, each getting lost in each other's gaze. After a few moments Addison smiled & looked away.

"Anyway, we should-"

She was cut off by Alex pulling her into him again, covering her mouth with his. She sighed against his mouth, his tongue teasing her botton lip. She opened her mouth slightly & deepened the kiss, now smiling even wider against him. She had no idea what this meant & how awkward this kiss could turn out but she was loving every second & had no intention of stopping.

Alex moved away from her mouth, giving them both time to breathe, & began laying butterly kisses down her neck. She draped her arms around his loosly, leaning her head slightly sideways for him to have better access to her neck. He moved back up & kissed her mouth gently before whispering in her ear. "I do care, Addie, & I love you."

She sighed & shook her head, pushing her hands against his chest so there was a distance between them. "You don't mean that, Alex. You can't say that to me, you're not allowed to get my hopes up," she whispered as she wiped a tear off her face.

"Addison, I mean it. I wouldn't lie to you. I love you, I'm in love with you, please just give me a chance to show you how much," he grabbed the hand that had wiped the tear away & held it between his hands, kissing the palm lightly.

"I can't deal with another heartbreak. I can't deal with another breakdown like the one I had two weeks ago which, truthfully, was caused a lot by men," she took a deep breath. "And it's not fair on you to have to put up with me like this. I'm a mess, Alex, you don't want to have to carry that around with you," she dropped her gaze to the floor suddenly finding her slippers very interesting.

"Addie look at me," he said. She didn't move. "Addie, please," he said, this time almost pleading. When, again, she didn't move he lifted her chin up with his finger, forcing her to look at him. "I'll always be here for you. I'll carry your problems & help you get through them. We can do this, Addison, I've never been so sure of something in my life. You just have to believe me."

Addison closed her eyes to stop any more tears wetting her face. "I don't know if I can do this. I don't want to get hurt again."

"I won't hurt you, I swear. And I won't let anybody else hurt you either. Please just say you'll give us a shot?"

She opened her eyes & looked at him. "Okay."

GAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGA

"Hey, George," Izzie called out & ran up to him. "Are you going to Alex's party tonight."

George nodded. "Yeah are you?"

"Yep!" she grinned. "He said Dr. Montgomery organized it. Should be fun."

"That it should," he agreed.

"You going with Callie?" George nodded. "Cool." They stood in silence, both thinking of what to say next which luck. Thankfully Derek & Meredith joined them & ended the awkward silence.

"Hey guys," Meredith smiled.

"Hi."

"Hey Mer."

Derek bit into his sandwich & waited to finish before speaking. "So you two going to Karev's tonight?"

George nodded & Izzie said, "yeah we are."

Derek nodded & took another bite of his sandwich. "Us too, it should-" he was cut off by his pager beeping. "Sorry, gotta go," he rolled his eyes, kissed Meredith on her cheek & walked away.

"Yeah, we should go too," Izzie stood up, facing George. "Gotta finish now so we can get off on time for tonight," George nodded & stood up next to her. "Bye Mer."

"Bye," Meredith smiled.

"See ya," George waved & followed Izzie out of the door.

Meredith sighed & leaned back in her chair. Although she wouldn't admit it to anyone, she was dreading the party that night. It wasn't that she didn't like Addison, because she did. Sure at first it was awkward & nobody thought they liked each other after everything that happened with Derek, but actually they got on quite well. But now they had more than Derek in common, they'd both lost control. Meredith had drowned (well it was only half her fault, sure she could have fought more but she didn't jumpt or anything) & Addison had overdosed (that had been her own fault). All Meredith could do now was hope.

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**A/N: Sorry, short chapter I just really want to upload something tonight. I've started some of the next chapter it's just a case of writing the rest & uploading now. Basically, I want to write the party in the next chapter & probably some cute Addex fluff in the one after that, & that should be the end of the story. I'm sort of blocked for ideas for this story so I think I should just stop it while it's okayish. So please review!!**

**Beth**


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